While it may seem to many that the SF Bay Area is the most tolerant, most accepting, most openly sexual place on Earth, there are still members who can lose their jobs, their families and friends and their livelihood if someone found out they are kinky or interested in kink.
It's why Janus takes confidentiality seriously.
What you choose to reveal about yourself is largely a matter of personal judgement although most people err on the side of caution. BDSM is not a "secret society." However, while many people in the lifestyle choose to be "out" and completely open about their interests, many others do not. It is important not to make any assumptions about this, to be discreet, and be respectful of each individual's personal choices.
This is well covered in our Orientation, but it's good to be especially cautious about approaching someone you have met at a BDSM event in a "vanilla" setting (such as a grocery store or shopping mall). If you meet someone at a BDSM event for the first time, consider avoiding personal questions such as "where do you work/live?" (at least, until you get to know them better).
Our confidentiality standards are clearly spelled out in our Operating Procedures (Part V). Feel free to read them and if you have any questions, please ask any officer for more information.